You might think it would be easy to spot which couples in these videos are heading down the tubes. And so I went out to visit him in Seattle, to sit with him and watch some of America's unfunniest home videos. I don't know about you, but when I heard about this, I wanted to understand exactly what Gottman was seeing on those videotapes. And he has found a whole taxonomy of things that doomed couples do that happy couples don't. What he does is he videotapes couples, follows their marriages for years, and then once he sees who stays together and who splits up, he goes back and tries to figure out what in the videos might have predicted that. When he says that he can predict, he means it in a more sciencey way. You can't go to John Gottman, sit with your spouse for a 15-minute videotape, and then have him declare to you on the spot, this will be your marital fate.
AJ THIS AMERICAN LIFE PLUS
Plus we have a real wedding band, the Doug Lawrence Orchestra, playing us wedding standards all this hour. That is three, yes, three big acts, each one designed to make your family happier. Starlee Kine gets answers about her parents' marriage from her dad after a lifetime of mystery. One man explains how.Īct Three, I Want to Be a Statistic. Like the 15th century explorers and mapmakers, there is a generation of scientists mapping out what happens in marriages, finding out stuff that people did not know about before.Īct Two, The Defense of Marriage Act. Our program today, in three acts:Īct One, What Really Happens in Marriages.
So today on our radio show, a look at what it really means to be married today. The number of couples living together without marrying is 10 times what it was in 1960, over 4.5 million people. Fewer households have children, and a fourth of all children are raised by just one parent. People are getting married at a later age than ever before in this country. The number of women getting married has dropped a third since 1970.
What it means to be married is up in the air right now, and not just because people are fighting about whether gays should be able to marry.
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